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How many times have you had the thought,
“When I get to ______ life will really be great!”
That is what I call the Golden Years. A time in life where we look forward to our future becoming better than what it is today. Life will really be great:
When I retire.
When the kids go off to college.
When I get that promotion.
When I buy that house.
When I take that trip.
When I lose weight.
When I meet Mr./Mrs Right
Having goals for our future isn’t wrong. I have goals for my future, but what if we are missing out on what’s available to us in the present because we are so focused on the future? Worse yet, what if we actually get to the future and we don’t find it as great as we thought it was.
I’m bored in retirement.
I miss the kids.
I’m stressed in my new job.
The house is so big I can’t find anyone.
It rained the whole time during my trip.
I lost weight, but gained it back.
My relationship ended.
The future could be as great as we think it will be, but we can’t know that today because it has happened yet. If fact, there is no guarantee we will get to our future. Life can get cut short through illness and accidents, jobs can end through layoffs, and houses burn down.
What I’ve been realizing though, it that the Golden Years are right now where ever I am and where ever I go.
The reason I’m not experiencing the Golden Years is that I’m not fully living in awareness of what I’m experiencing today. I’m too preoccupied with the future, too stressed about what hasn’t happened yet, and too anxious about my goals and if they will happen.
Here’s an example: I’ve had this idea that my blog and podcast will really be making an impact in people’s lives when I hit 100,000 readers each month. Right now I have about 22oo, and if I focus on how far I am from my goal I get discouraged and feel like I’m wasting my time.
But what if the Golden Years of my blog and podcast are right now? If I practice the skill of living a life of awareness I realize that writing and speaking my ideas is helping me become the person I want to be. I appreciate the people who are showing up each month to read and listen. I’m meeting people I never would have met if I had not started a podcast. I’m grateful for the experience.
Living a life of awareness means that we are paying attention to the present moment.
What am I feeling right now?
What am I thinking?
What is grabbing my attention?
What do I notice?
What do I see?
What do I hear?
What am I sensing?
Living in the present is challenging because our internal thinking, the demands we place on ourselves and demands from other people can rip us out of the now and into the anxiety of the future. Living in the present brings a deeper and fuller experience.
When I am living a life of awareness and living in the present:
I appreciate and love my wife more.
I see how extraordinary my kids are.
I experience the beauty of my surroundings.
I am more open and flexible.
I’m less frustrated when things don’t work out.
I find more meaning in my work.
I’m more content with what I have and what I don’t
Don’t waste time, relationships, and experience waiting for the future. Practice living life with awareness and being present in the moment and see how the Golden Years are right now.
Here are some resources that I’ve found helpful as I’m learning how to practice living in awareness.
Slow Down to the Speed of Life, by Richard Carlson and Joe Bailey. This is a great read about how to get your mind out of the past and out of the future so you can live with more peace and contentment in a busy world.
Interview with Joe Bailey Co-Author of Slow Down to the Speed of Life on the 5Percenters Podcast. Click here. Joe and I talk about the concepts in his book and apply them to living an excellent life.
Zen Parenting Podcast with Cathy Cassini Adams and Todd Adams. If you have kids this is an excellent podcast about living the life you want your kids to learn. Their tag line is, “The best predictor of your child’s well being is a parent’s self-understanding”. Even if you don’t have kids, this is an excellent podcast about living a life of awareness.